To all those requiring me to press an "I Accept" button,
BE IT KNOWN!
If I press an "I Accept" button for your Agreement, by default you have accepted my "I Accept" Agreement Extension and you will be held accountable until I explicitly release you from your commitment.
This is a fully retroactive and infinitely reflexive extension to any previously-signed or to-be-signed "I Accept" web page "Agreement".
"You"/"Your" (the perpetrator) designates those responsible for the original "Agreement". This includes company officers, Board of Directors members, corporate or hired attorneys, complicit employees, together with their spouses, siblings, progeny, ancestors, or any close acquaintances thereof.
"I"/"Me"/"My" (the perpetratee), designates the person asked to sign Your 20,000-word, often unprintable, gobbledygook "Agreement", displayed in a tiny scrollable window, together with all the similar documents linked to from it.
You are required to read the following text thoroughly and completely, including any modifications included in the translation section below. By incomprehensibilis leges et vanitas verba this entire document is considered to be an extension of Your unintelligible "Service Agreement", "Membership Agreement", "Privacy Policy", etc., document that You required to be signed electronically via an "I Accept" button.
This extension is subject to change. It is recommended that you review it at least daily. Any files linked from this extension are considered to be incorporated in the base document. Your inability to access such linked documents, or to notice their possible occasional ephemeral appearance, does not invalidate them in any way. Spyware or other malware may be included in this extension. You have been duly warned.
Privacy considerations will be described in the Privacy Considerations document, if/when it becomes available. Privacy is considered overrated by the unnamed third-party participants to whom Your data has been or will be given.
Warranty Disclaimer: The submitted "I Accept" is a "use at your own risk" signature, which can be discontinued without notice or obligation for replacement. As with Your product, the signature is not suitable for anything, probably does not work, and there is absolutely no liability incurred by Me if You try to use it. Should any dispute arise, You agree (by acceptance of My "I accept") to have this settled by an arbitration panel of My choosing. (That panel consists of my brother.)
You are allowed only one copy of this extension, which can be viewed on only a single PC. I am not saying which one.
This document is copyrighted and its accessibility is time-limited. However any legal obligations on Your part will auto-renew at Your expense. Penalties apply; they will be determined at the time of any failure on Your part to abide by the terms of this extension. You should now hire a level-five exorcist, just in case.
No worries!
Nikibonyeza kitufe cha "Ninakubali" kwa Makubaliano yako, kwa chaguo-msingi umekubali Kiendelezi changu cha Mkataba wa "Ninakubali" na utawajibishwa hadi nitakapokuachilia kwa uwazi kutoka kwa ahadi yako.
Hii ni ugani kikamilifu retroactive na infinitely reflexive yoyote hapo awali-saini au kwa-kuwa-saini "Mimi Kubali" mtandao ukurasa "Mkataba".
"Wewe"/"Yako" (mkosaji) designates wale waliohusika kwa "Mkataba" awali. Hii ni pamoja na maafisa wa kampuni, Bodi ya Wakurugenzi wanachama, wanasheria wa kampuni au mshahara, wafanyakazi makosa, pamoja na wenzi wao, ndugu, kizazi, mababu, au marafiki wa karibu yake yoyote.
"Mimi"/"Mimi"/"Yangu" (perpetratee), designates mtu aliuliza kusaini Yako 20,000-neno, mara nyingi unprintable, gobbledygook "Mkataba", visas katika dirisha dogo scrollable, pamoja na nyaraka zote sawa wanaohusishwa na kutoka humo.
Wewe wanatakiwa kusoma maandishi yafuatayo kabisa na kabisa, ikiwa ni pamoja na marekebisho yoyote pamoja na katika sehemu ya tafsiri. Kwa incomprehensibilis leges et vanitas verba waraka huu mzima anahesabiwa kuwa ugani wa Yako unintelligible "Huduma ya Mkataba", "Mkataba Uanachama", "Privacy Policy", nk, hati kwamba Wewe required kuwa saini umeme kupitia "Mimi Kubali" button.
Ugani Hii ni kubadilika. Inapendekezwa kwamba wewe mapitio yake angalau kila siku. Files yoyote zinazoungwa ugani hii ni kuchukuliwa kwa kuingizwa katika hati ya msingi. Yako na kukosa uwezo wa kupata hati hizo wanaohusishwa, au kwa taarifa za mara kwa mara yao iwezekanavyo ephemeral kuonekana, haina kubatilisha yao kwa njia yoyote. Spyware au zisizo nyingine inaweza kuwa ni pamoja na katika ugani hii. Wewe wamekuwa duely alionya.
Eusebio Privacy itakuwa ilivyoelezwa katika mazingatio Eusebio Privacy hati, ikiwa/wakati inakuwa inapatikana. Privacy ni kuchukuliwa overrated na washiriki unnamed tatu ambaye Yako data imekuwa au atapewa.
Udhamini Kanusho: in "Mimi Kubali" ni "matumizi katika hatari yako mwenyewe" signature, ambayo inaweza imekoma bila taarifa au wajibu kwa ajili ya uwekaji. Kama na Yako bidhaa, saini si mzuri kwa kitu chochote, pengine hana kazi, na kuna kabisa hakuna dhima inayodaiwa Mimi kama Wewe kujaribu kuitumia. Je mgogoro yoyote kutokea, Wewe kukubaliana (kwa kukubali Yangu "Mimi kukubali") kwa kuwa na makazi na jopo la upatanishi wa Yangu kuchagua. (jopo Kwamba lina ndugu yangu.)
Wewe wanaruhusiwa nakala moja tu ya ugani hii, ambayo inaweza kutazamwa kwenye PC tu moja. Mimi sisemi ambayo moja.
Waraka huu ni copyrighted na upatikanaji wake ni muda mdogo. Hata hivyo yoyote majukumu ya kisheria juu ya Yako sehemu mapenzi auto-upya katika Yako gharama. Adhabu kuomba; wao itajulikana wakati wa kushindwa yoyote juu ya Yako sehemu kukaa na suala la ugani hii. Unapaswa sasa kuajiri primo roho mbaya extractor, tu katika kesi.
Ikiwa hukusoma kwa uangalifu sehemu hii ya tafsiri, mbaya sana! Adhabu zote sasa zimeongezwa mara tatu na vipindi vya msamaha vimepunguzwa kwa nusu.
Hakuna matata!
(If you have to ask, you don't have a Need To Know. Just trust us. We have your best interests at heart.)
"AGREEMENT_EXTENSION_X.HTM" 10 Jun 2024 21:56:24 (JGKNAUTH)